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B!tch on the Street

Days and nights in New York City are tough enough without having to deal with all the sh!t this city dishes up. B!tch on the Street tells the tale of two ladies making their way through this crazy town...one freak at a time.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Oh No She Didn't...

Pookie and I were at a fabulous pre-sale at a lovely handbag store in Midtown yesterday. We looked all over and found some nice bags, but one in particular caught my eye. I pulled Pookie past the throngs of desperate sale-seekers to show her. Pointing to the bag as we approached it, I said, "Look at it! Isn't that awesome!"

Right before our eyes, this whore grabbed the bag that I pointed at and said to her ugly, large-hatted friend, "This is nice!". Then she glanced at Pookie and me and smiled. Her friend said, "Oooooh. I saw that there's a matching smaller bag on the other side!"

"Oh no she didn't!", I exclaimed angrily. Pookie said, "Well, it's clear she has no taste of her own and had to take the one you like." Ho-bag ignored us and these two b!tches stood there admiring MY bag, so I naturally took their picture.

I said loudly, "That bag is too big anyway. Let's go look over there." Pook knew exactly what I had in mind and she went right over to the matching smaller bag. I picked it up and we made a show of saying how unique it was and all that jazz. Soon, the b!tch came over to where we were and said to her friend, "That IS the matching bag. Oh, I have to have it!" and then she looks at me all sweetly and inquiringly as I'm holding it. "Sorry," I quip in a sugary sweet tone. "This one's mine. I wanted the one you have, but you snatched it up right before my eyes." "OH! I didn't realize! *(yeah, right b!tch!)* Are you sure? I really would like the matching one," she blubbered. "I'd trade bags with you if you like," I offered. "Well that's stupid. I want both." she said very b!tchily. "Well then you're sh!t out of luck," Pookie said.

We left her and her friend gaping at us and wandered around. I didn't really want the bag, but I didn't want her to have it more. I didn't buy it (that sh!t was over $300! I'm not THAT crazy) because I really needed a larger bag. Instead, Pookie and I hid it in a very obscure section of the store where the doggie carriers are kept.

I hope that b!tch never finds it.

17 Comments:

At 3:13 PM, Blogger Liz said...

Clearly that cow didn't know who she was dealing with! And I concur, if you're going to drop real money on a bag, it at least needs to be the right size!

 
At 4:14 PM, Blogger Spill The Beans said...

Heh. $300 on a purse? Y'all are crazy up there in NYC. ;)

 
At 5:18 PM, Blogger yllwdaisies said...

fucker! (not you, the skank)

 
At 8:17 PM, Blogger v said...

300 bucks? Damn. You know you can get a video ipod for that much or something.

Silly girls.

Lol, you two are hilarious though. Especially the Pookster, what a potty mouth.

 
At 9:10 PM, Blogger Marcia said...

you two crack me up. Can I hang out with you in... 13 months?

 
At 9:41 PM, Blogger Pass me another cold one said...

Girls after my own heart!!

 
At 10:54 PM, Blogger Kiki said...

that bitch deserved what she got. She should have known better than to take your purse from you. People have been cut for less. Good for you!

 
At 11:07 PM, Blogger daionara said...

So the question is, did she buy the bag you wanted?

 
At 10:15 AM, Blogger katie-q said...

good for you, I totally would have done the same thing, or if I was feeling extra bitchy, I may have purchased it and then returned it after I knew she was gone!

 
At 4:08 PM, Blogger M-M-M-Mishy said...

That was the perfect course of action to take! Bravo, you two. Women after my own heart.

Oh, and my favourite part is the picture.

 
At 4:09 PM, Blogger Softball Slut said...

POWER TO THE PEOPLE!!! Way to go you!!

 
At 1:49 AM, Blogger KaY said...

you go girl! that's the way to show her!

 
At 9:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
HAHAHA!

BOTS rocks!! And you have a fan all the way from Singapore!

 
At 12:37 PM, Blogger Fairmaiden327 said...

Seriously? I would have elbowed her. Yeah, I'm all class. Missed you Pook and Kat.

 
At 3:02 PM, Blogger blog Portland said...

I'm somewhhat surprised you didn't apply a generous amount of a bodily fluid/substance to the purse, then kindly offer it to her. Still, kudos for refraining from physical violence. That only gets you jail time, however satisfying it may be.

 
At 11:09 PM, Anonymous Kat said...

I love you guys.

 
At 12:09 AM, Anonymous thatskinnybitch said...

u crack me up! :)

 

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