Oh No She Didn't...
Pookie and I were at a fabulous pre-sale at a lovely handbag store in Midtown yesterday. We looked all over and found some nice bags, but one in particular caught my eye. I pulled Pookie past the throngs of desperate sale-seekers to show her. Pointing to the bag as we approached it, I said, "Look at it! Isn't that awesome!"
Right before our eyes, this whore grabbed the bag that I pointed at and said to her ugly, large-hatted friend, "This is nice!". Then she glanced at Pookie and me and smiled. Her friend said, "Oooooh. I saw that there's a matching smaller bag on the other side!"
"Oh no she didn't!", I exclaimed angrily. Pookie said, "Well, it's clear she has no taste of her own and had to take the one you like." Ho-bag ignored us and these two b!tches stood there admiring MY bag, so I naturally took their picture.
I said loudly, "That bag is too big anyway. Let's go look over there." Pook knew exactly what I had in mind and she went right over to the matching smaller bag. I picked it up and we made a show of saying how unique it was and all that jazz. Soon, the b!tch came over to where we were and said to her friend, "That IS the matching bag. Oh, I have to have it!" and then she looks at me all sweetly and inquiringly as I'm holding it. "Sorry," I quip in a sugary sweet tone. "This one's mine. I wanted the one you have, but you snatched it up right before my eyes." "OH! I didn't realize! *(yeah, right b!tch!)* Are you sure? I really would like the matching one," she blubbered. "I'd trade bags with you if you like," I offered. "Well that's stupid. I want both." she said very b!tchily. "Well then you're sh!t out of luck," Pookie said.
We left her and her friend gaping at us and wandered around. I didn't really want the bag, but I didn't want her to have it more. I didn't buy it (that sh!t was over $300! I'm not THAT crazy) because I really needed a larger bag. Instead, Pookie and I hid it in a very obscure section of the store where the doggie carriers are kept.
I hope that b!tch never finds it.